I documented it on around page 2/3 of this thread
If you remove one of the PLs, PVC2 and char ROM, the onboard graphics is going to lay off all the I/O, and the external graphics card is going to function properly. I've done hours on M19+VGA in this way, and tested all VGA functionality working.
Prior to removing the chips, the VGA would work simultaneously with onboard, machine providing two outputs. Basic text mode worked fine, but touching regs either by more elaborate text programs like NC, or going into graphics, froze the system.
Therefore without keeping the PL, PVC2 and 6845 under reset all the time, you cannot disconnect the onboard.
What is done with my workaround, PL is removed and PVC2 is removed, but 6845 isn't. Removing the character ROM seems to bug 6845 enough to not work properly in addressing, but it, and possibly other stuff, can be damaged, maybe due to mandatory load being disconnected.
I believe you haven't tested the graphics outside of the boot screen - don't. Maybe the collision when the system frozes hurts the onboard card.
There is a lot of merit in keeping the external graphics disconnected, supplying an alternate output if it goes wrong for one...we should find a way how to do it properly.